July 28, 2020

2020.07.28

Expectations.

I started using the Surface Go and I want to do more on it but there's other stuff I need to do.

RR from bodyweight fitness.

I have a meeting with B at 1pm, so I want to be on site before that.

Then I am picking up the mirror and bringing it to A onsite and leaving it there for a day where I can drive or bus in to carry it home.

I want to get 3 more job applications in today.I might meet a friend in the afternoon, but I'm not sure.

Reality.

Food-related talk.

Since I ate part of today's meals yesterday, obviously I'm going to struggle harder today. This is true right at breakfast, where I ate half of what I had for lunch, two carrots, and a frozen banana, with a bunch of coffee. (Coffee used to suppress my appetite.)

8-10am.

I downloaded Leonardo, a drawing program. I had to take the Surface Go off "S" mode to use it. This is a downside - to use anything but microsoft store apps (which are few), you need to use a less "optimized" mode of the Surface. I played around with that for an hour.

10am.

Then I did the RR. I did fewer sets and didn't do planks. I'm hungry but I ate too much, I'm tired but I haven't exercised that much, and my body hurts. It might be my new birth control, since my body is probably sensitive to hormones.

Sorry for talking so much about food, but it's just something I struggle with and have struggled with for a long time. I wish I was normal and could just not eat for long periods of time and then eat healthy food and weigh a healthy amount and that would be that.

I received a response from a job application, but not one I put down as having applied to. It was a rejection, so I suppose it.. doesn't matter?

That makes for 23 applications, 2 of which I interviewed for, (1 of which I temporarily working for), 9 of which have rejected me.

11am.

I feel exhausted. I'm already struggling to stay awake, and it's not even noon.

I didn't bike to work today. I'm picking up my new mirror today and carrying it on the bus, so that's my excuse.

5pm-7pm.

Anyhow, I met with a friend and we walked for some time.

I bought my mirror and went home, and now I'm going to work on some stuff for A and then probably go to bed.

Parting notes.

My friend sent me a link to a vegan youtuber, which I watched at 4x speed (I have a chrome extension). I can't say I learned much, but I want to read up on adrenal fatigue. I don't trust any lifestyle youtuber farther than I can throw them (and most of my muscles are in my legs, so... I probably couldn't even pick them up). Most just follow what some other vegan pieced together from cherry-picking studies and shelling out their merchandise. I follow wfpb, but I prefer to look at science and experts. I used to watch loads of lifestyle and diet youtubers, but after you see a certain amount, you start to realize they all just parrot each other and don't really do their own research. Also, they're largely into selling their books, workouts, and weight loss diets - not really pure intents, right? They're selling a product, and their bodies are part of the sales pitch. Detox smoothies? Juice fasts? No thanks.

Sorry to be a downer! But I don't buy into that sort of thing anymore.

This sort of summarizes how I view it: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IhtnaieCV0I

Which is ironic given it's another youtuber.

I really like the people in the wfpb chat and community for a more science based approach, but I still don't like following one doctor or any one given diet because I know that people will miscontrue, deny, and cherry pick "evidence" to fit their ideals. Even Dr. Greger, who wrote "how not to die" has done this. And then you add the dimension of being a youtuber whose job is not to be a scientist, but to sell themselves as entertainment... bogus nation.

This might come off as critical and rude, but I've been around this sort of thing for a long time. Fool me once, shame on them. Fool me twice... shame on me.

Further notes on further notes. Adrenal fatigue isn't a "real" condition recognized by medical professionals. https://www.health.harvard.edu/blog/is-adrenal-fatigue-real-2018022813344

https://www.webmd.com/a-to-z-guides/adrenal-fatigue-is-it-real#1

Anyways, I'm not going to talk about food, weight, or stuff like that in my journals anymore. It's all going to go in my logs.

Written by lays_chips

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