March 20, 2023

elden things

I hopped onto discord just in time to hear: “they can shove that lore up their asses. my god.” it sounds like HGR is having a fun time playing Elden Ring.

oh, apparently the boss (the putrid avatar) gave him scarlet rot. it sprays scarlet goop, which, to HGR, is indistinguishable from the color of the ground. not sure if it’s a vision thing, a monitor thing, or both. I can see it, although the color difference is not great and would be easy to miss in the middle of a frantic fight. in any case, HGR is holding George R.R. Martin personally responsible for this.

“you’re being willfully obtuse, newbie” oh no!!

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update (3/20): HGR tried the putrid avatar again and beat it in one try. however, later in the day, a new problem arose: the horse has a turning radius. if the horse is standing at the edge of a platform (say, during a tricky platforming sequence), and you press backward, the horse will initially move forward, sending you off the edge of the platform to your death.

the solution is to dismount every time you want to turn around on a platform. then, after turning, you re-mount. (you need to use the horse for the jumps, because it has a double jump and you don’t.) however, in one instance, HGR was somehow stuck on a corner and the game wouldn’t let him dismount, so he had to attempt to turn around using the horse and fell off the platform. that’s bs, dps.

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update (3/21): “fuck this fucking horse I hate him so much”

“it’s not about learning, newbie. he’s buck wild. he will not be tamed”

Written by Achaius

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