this misbegotten world is to blame

I don’t think I’ve mentioned quof’s cognitohazard yet. During Superchain Theory I, for the second orb, we get into light party stacks. Light debuffs go on the left, dark debuffs go on the right, except the people with the laser debuffs do the opposite (light laser goes right, dark laser goes left). As a shorthand mnemonic, quof suggested “laser left.” This will not work and will, in fact, wipe the party without fail. It is also incredibly catchy and easy to remember. We’ve had multiple wipes thanks to this.

(Favorite call in the game: “dps heavensflame.” Love going to my spot and not worrying about dropping a tower or taking someone else’s tower, especially because that’s my second wildfire window, excuse me, I am busy. Everyone else loves it too. We have a much higher success rate on dps heavensflame and it is not ONLY my fault)

On Saturday, we had enrages at 8%, 3%, and 3%. On Sunday, we had enrages at 4%, 4%, 1%, 0.2%, 0.8%, and 4% before clearing. What I’m saying is, we were overdue.

The 0.8% enrage was particularly sad. Immediately before that pull, we had a mixup on superchain 2b, after which newbie said to Luis: “Do you know what your clock spot is?!”

“Yes?” said Luis.

“What is your clock spot?” (Classic meisnewbie pop quiz.)

“Southwest.”

“Okay. Do you want to switch clock spots??” newbie, as monk, has one of the north clock spots for melee uptime, so this would be a sacrifice on his part.

Anyway, Luis did not want to switch clock spots, and we proceeded with the pull. During superchain 2b, Luis ran into MY clock spot, which is southeast, and we both died to proteans. (In that particular pull, my clock spot was the farthest away spot, meaning that Luis ran past his clock spot to get to mine.) Then both our corpses fell through the collapsing platforms just as HGR panicked and used healer LB3, which did not work, because we were both lost in time and space. Melee LB3 would’ve done 1.6% of the boss’s health, so, mega rip.

BUT it turned out for the best because I had a CLEAN RUN on our winning pull. (15% parse. I’ll take it.) Then we had half an hour to prog Athena 2. Music drop!!

“This is going to sound weird considering I like White Stone Black,” I said, “but this is just noise.”

“Big yikes,” said numbers.