Renewed Habitica Challenges, Did Dailies

11:48 PM

Today has been good. I don't think I wrote an entry for Saturday and Sunday so I'll go over those days first.

On Saturday, I just did my dailies again, and browsed the Internet. Eric called me and asked if I could help him out with a job to drive him some place so he could pick up a car, and then we'd meet up somewhere else. I wasn't doing anything else, so I helped him with this job, he gave me $10.

Sunday was a great day. I didn't have anything planned, so I just did my dailies again. The thing that stood out the most is that I went to the park, and walked for around 3.5 hours straight. I ended up eating a lot when I got home, so maybe I cancelled out any calorie burn. I also messaged Wahl again today and she replied the same day, I guess we're talking again, as friends, but I have hope it can develop into something more.

Sunday was basically a great lesson because I started it off pretty badly. I woke up at around 1 or 2 AM after falling asleep around 9 or 10 PM, so I barely had any sleep. I had no plans for the day, and I didn't feel like doing my dailies at all. Still, I did them, just because I wasn't doing anything else, and I already had a habit to doing them. So I played the brain training games, and I swept the floors, washed the dishes, did my workouts. I was still bored, and the time was around 4 AM.

That was when I decided to go to the park again, and I would walk the entire course, which would take around 4.5 hours if there weren't these closed off sections. So I walked for around 3.5 hours, since there were these entire large parts of the walk that were closed off for repair or construction or something. The cool thing is that my heart rate was under 100 nearly the whole time, around 90-95 most of the time. I think by the last 45 minutes or so, it went to over 100, prior to that it was under 100 the whole time. I guess my VO2 Max improved or something? Normally when I'm walking, my heart rate is like at 105 or so, but it was nicely low this time around.

So I went home, and had a great rest of the day. i just felt so confident and energized having completed all the open parts of the park course. It's a lineal park, it's basically a very long sidewalk course through some trees, grass, waters, and other scenery, around 6-8 miles or something long. Walking one way will take 2 hours, walking back another 2 hours, so in total it takes 4 hours or so to walk the course. But today, some parts were closed off in both ends, with some road blocks or a fence (one side had a fence, the other had a road block) and a guard saying you couldn't continue walking forward, so you turned around a bit earlier instead of walking the whole way.

During that walk I uninstalled all of my superstition apps related to tarots and horoscopes. Since then I haven't done any weird superstition thing to base decisions on. I just left it to me to make those choices.

Anyway I got back home and rested for a bit, browsed the Internet, messaged Wahl, got replies from her, messaged her again, went to sleep. I was planning on working on catching up on my finances, but I couldn't even bring myself to start.

So today is Monday, March 11th. I woke up around 8 or 9 AM. Both EST and AST (Atlantic Standard Time, where I am), are now in sync again. AST used to be an hour ahead, due to daylights savings, so I'd often not have to worry about work emails until 10 AM. Now I have to worry about them at 9 AM.

I did my dailies again today, even though I was tired and even though I didn't feel like doing them, I still did them. I pretty much rested the rest of the day. Some new books arrived today, including Ender's Game, which I read a bit of again today. I read the whole book already before when I was in 9th grade. Some programming books arrived too. Great stuff to read and learn, but I feel so overwhelmed now, having so many more books.

Gosh I am tired. I later renewed the Habitica challenges again, and these were the fewest people that ever joined ever. There was less than 100 people that joined each of the challenges. Weird.

After that, I went to the gym again with some friends, and worked out. That was fun. I got home, ate a little, and started this entry. That was pretty much my whole day today.

I'm both very tired right now, and also wide awake. I'm very tired because I'm just physically tired. I'm wide awake because my mind is wide awake. I usually let fatigue make me fall asleep. So as long as I have some energy, I tend to stay up. It's hard for me to stay still and just lie down in bed and think about nothing. I feel like I'm in a prison when I do that and it gets a bit harder to breathe. I felt like that working at a cubicle every weekday for a few years, I felt so constrained working in that cubicle, but I was extremely productive, and got a lot of work done.

I kind of feel that way even today. I am so free today. I can do anything I want, whenever I want. I have basically all the time and money in the world. I don't even have to work if I don't want to, and even if I do work, I just work on what I want to work on. So I have so much freedom today. The problem is, I still feel so constrained. I don't know what it is, but I don't feel so free, even though I do have ultimate freedom.

I really need to work on my to dos and just get my life prioritized so I can work on what's truly important.