Challange: Do not lose myself again

hiii journal

I studied math like 4 h today

bro i am exhausteeeed

but i also run away from this girl from pinterest that i wanted to meet but you know i had to study and i was scared

I will get her instagram next week

Wish me luck on exams tomorrow.

I am scared tbh.

I do not really know why, i want to cry. I feel soo bad. I do not even do anything. Nobody did not do anything to me. I just feel like I will lose myself. And I am so scared that this will happen. Again. I do not want to live through this time again. I am better now. I hope so. I feel better but I am scared that later i will not feel that way and whole cycle will repeat itselfs. Am I really this annoying? Am I really that much fucked up?

Whyy my brain is so loud.

I am tireddd

I do not want to lose myself.

I love my smile. I love happy me. I can not afford to lose her again.

I am scared that this time i could not make it.

Full of fear

XYZ