Got a Haircut

1:59 AM (of Sunday, July 6th, 2025)

Today is Saturday, July 5th, 2025. The days are going too fast for me to keep up. Every day has pretty much been the same, not much new or different. I sleep at night, wake up a few hours later, watch some shows, do some exercises, do some chores, do some work, browse social media, and then sleep and repeat. It's the same thing over and over again. Over and over and over and over and over and over again.

I should always reflect on what I'm doing with my life, every single day, because right now I feel like I'm just letting all my time go to waste.

There's a lot of tasks that I'm procrastinating on for no reason. There's absolutely no reason I should be procrastinating on any of my tasks, which aren't so difficult, and yet I do. It's so foolish.

Today I watched a lot of Rick and Morty. I've seen every single episode already. There's many shows that I have seen all the episodes for. Pretty much every popular anime and a lot of not-so-popular anime, I've seen every episode for. For a lot of popular cartoons, I've seen every episode for. There's this one website called Watch Cartoons Online, where they have every single anime and cartoon up for streaming.

On most of my days I will visit the site and in a single day watch several series. It really doesn't take long to watch all the episodes in a series, most of them are 12 episodes long, which take just 4-5 hours to watch through the whole thing. I sometimes leave it on in the background while I do chores. Some series' I've seen many times. There's really no point to watching a series again (or even the first time) at all, but it's comforting, more comforting than the tasks that I procrastinate on.

I sometimes feel like crying with how repetitive and seemingly pointless my days are. What am I doing with my life? Just the same thing over and over, watching the days go by, getting a little bit older every day.

Wahl messaged me again yesterday, for the first time in a long time. She basically just wished me Happy July 4th. I thought was going to respond to all my other messages I sent her, but she hasn't yet, she might have just skipped them never reply to them. I'm glad she thought of me at least. I am still in love with her for sure.

Anyway, I had a haircut today. I went up to a local beauty salon, mainly only women go there, but I went there as a guy. The place is about 5 minutes away from where I live, so it's convenient. Having visited so many different barbershops here over the years, the price is only slightly more expensive than the cheapest option I know of here, the haircut here was $33 and then I added $5 tip, but the cheapest option is like $28 and that place sucks. The most expensive place is $50 for a haircut, but I honestly had a better experience here.

Anyway, I had a haircut with a guy named Angelo. I didn't expect to chat with him, but he started talking to me, and we talked the whole time. We chat in Spanish the whole time. I always think that I suck at Spanish, but apparently I can converse in it decently. The haircut took over an hour, and he also shaved and trimmed my beard for me, what an amazing guy. We exchanged phone numbers at the end, and he gave me a tight bro hug.

I honestly came in there pretty down in the dumps, and conversing with Angelo cheered me up. I'm also surprised that I can converse in Spanish for an hour, because I rarely use Spanish. I studied it for 6 years in school, and I had private tutoring in it for around a year, but I basically haven't used Spanish in years even though I live in a Spanish speaking country. It's surprising that I still knew a bunch of words, they just came up whenever I wanted to mention something. I don't know how I remember the words either. Like 'dibujar' means to draw, 'palabra' means word, I rarely use these words, maybe I used them a handful of times in my life, but they came up instantly in conversation whenever I wanted to talk about these concepts.

I am not fluent in Spanish, but I am fluent in English and another language, Tagalog, and I love being fluent in different languages. It's such an interesting ability because you don't have to think about it, you can just instantly and subconsciously understand and speak another language without any effort. It doesn't take me any effort to write these words, it doesn't take you any effort to read these words, you understand them instantly, but imagine this ability for more than one language, and it's just so amazing.

But anyway, I connected and vibed really well with Angelo, hence why the haircut took over an hour, we socialized a bunch that entire time, laughed and told jokes and stories, stuff like that. It's been a while since I talked to and connected with another person. I thought for a while that I was too hideous to go outside, hence why for many months I just stayed indoors and kept to myself.

So yeah, what's surprising is how much more masculine I look after the haircut. I thought that I just got chubby again, and that my face looked like garbage, because it was so round. It turns out that's just my hair, which was in a sort of bowl-cut shape, making my face look round. After the haircut and my hair being sharp again, my face looks lean and masculine.

Due to fasting when I was already normal BMI, I now have somewhat sunken cheeks. I don't like the look of sunken cheeks, it makes me look aged and depraved. Also, my skin texture looks aged due to minoxidil damage. I used to have an extremely clear skin complexion that looked youthful and nice, even many months after minoxidil this hasn't fully recovered yet, oh well, I've still made massive recovery and strides in a lot of areas since then, even improvements from before.

Something that did get worse though, is my beard. Ironically I used minoxidil to help me grow a thicker beard, and now I have a worse beard from it. I have bald spots in places on my beard and mustache now, that were not bald spots before. These spots are slowly recovering, but due to this my beard looks lighter than before. It takes many months for the hair cycle to reset, so it won't be for many months until these bald spots recover.

I really do like my appearance now though, because it looks so heavily masculine. I thought I had lost this masculinity after minoxidil, but it seems to be back. Look at how stern, muscular, and solid my face looks. It is very rare for Asians to look this masculine, like, seriously, my face although it does look aged from minoxidil damage, it is square, solid, rugged, strong. It's so cool. I like this look so much. I honestly did not think a haircut could change a face by so much. My face went from soft and round to this kind of muscle kind of look, very cool.

Another unexpected effect is that although I have the same exact body as prior to the haircut, my body now also looks so much more muscular and masculine, due to having a very masculine head and face. Although my arms are the same size, they do look so much bigger and more muscular now, just due to my face and head looking more rugged and muscular. It is a weird effect, but it's true. I don't have any pictures to show a before and after of my body, but this is definitely the case.

Just like how my round face turned to rugged just from a haircut, the same effect happened to my body, just through a haircut. It's such an interesting effect. My overall aura is also different, I look like a predator oozing testosterone, although I would never hurt an animal since I am vegan. I even let out a large millipede that got into my home today, it was fascinating seeing thousands of legs moving around, it had so many legs they looked like hairs, what a cool creature.

See the pictures below on how a round face turned rugged just from a haircut. My face turned very chad-like, especially the second photo. Look at that jawline, I hate the sunken cheeks though, hate it, I looked just as masculine without the sunken cheeks. That is an extremely masculine face, this is also in every angle, not just from the ones I took.

I forgot the word for it, but most Asian males have this "youth-like" characteristic, see K-Pop idols and Asian male actors, opposite of western masculinity characteristics. I'm happy to have a masculine face, it's a rarity and I think it looks nice.

So, it was all in the hair. I've cycled through having this look since my early 20s, sometimes I would just be like, wow I look so masculine, and I thought I lost this look after using minoxidil, but it was revealed again from a haircut. Just from a haircut. Also, even though it might look like I am scowling or whatever, I'm not, I am making a neutral expression in all these photos.

Oh yeah, since I'm not getting any younger, I'm going to tell Wahl tomorrow that I love her still. I've already told her a bunch of times in the past so whatever. I'll let her know too that we're both not getting any younger. I can't really waste any more time.

Anyway, that was my day today.