Mental Health Journey Day 21

Currently Listening to: Clash (Mixed) by Caravan Palace

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Another short entry because I don't feel like writing a lot. I just need to focus on my health right now.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Today was pretty tough. Yesterday I went to a nice party with some friends. The morning was terrible. I felt super tired. Maybe because I only slept for six hours. Well ... At least I had some fun with friends.

I was planning to study today, but I only studied for an hour so far (it's already evening here). In about two hours, I'm going on a walk.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Mental health:

Again, not good. That's the reason why I write the journal.

Today, I struggle a lot with some symptoms I tried to ignore for a long time. It's crazy that I need to fight these symptoms, even though my life has been pretty good recently. I have many friends, and I can study (even though my health hinders me). Why do I need to deal with it?

I have an answer: because I am in a safe situation right now.

This is so annoying. I hate to deal with these issues! In my current place the people accept me. Why do I feel so scared? It's so annoying ...

Here are some issues I struggle with:

• communicate with people and understand how the communication is working (I keep misinterpreting such things)
• anxiety (especially while talking to other people)
• cleaning my room (I was thinking about asking a friend to help me via face time)
• to focus on things (unfortunately, I can't deal with it with my medication right now)

At least I can recognise it and write it down. I should talk about it with my new doctor. I don't feel like meeting a new doctor because I liked my former one.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A few things I enjoyed:

• to drink my matcha latte (I see so many videos of people hating matcha. I feel like they all try to hate it because it's popular. Well, I liked it before it was popular lol. I understand why people don't like it, but seeing so many people hating matcha is difficult to deal with for me. Mainly because used to copying other people and their opinions to fit in)
• to do a small sketch
• to read a few pages of Iron Widow (I need to finish it by Tuesday because I need to return it)
• to play the Visual Novel Steins;Gate

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Conclusion:

• Always write down what you are currently thinking. At least it worked for me.
• Having a mental illness is extremely exhausting.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

That's it for today. Have fun, everyone!