Currently listening to: Wonderland by Caravan Palace
(I am wondering if anyone noticed that my favourite band is Caravan Palace)
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I am feeling super motivated today. I had a nice breakfast and now I can work on my upcoming exam. I hate to study for this exam in particular, because the sheets literally say nothing at all. All I can do is study with the exercises, which are annoying to do, because I struggle with how to solve them. Well, I suppose it's a challenge.
I really want to go to a party, to dance and to have fun. The new semester starts soon; therefore, I can go to so many different parties. I am looking forward to partying with some friends,
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Third day of being clean of SH so far!
I am doing fine so far. I just took my medication, therefore I feel too focused to deal with my mental health.
I recently read that taking adhd medication can reduce the risk of suicidal thoughts. This works for me; nevertheless, I plan to ask my doctor for antidepressants. The effects of antidepressants are much longer (as far as I know) than my adhd medication.
In addition to that, I need to look for a good psychologist. I am scared my future psychologist will force a label upon me like my former psychologists. I was thinking about talking about my problems, which I have in my everyday life, like my social difficulties. I guess they would just tell me to get the autism diagnosis (which I already plan to take, unfortunately, I have to wait at least two years for one clinic, and the waitlist for the other clinic is currently closed). Or they are not educated on neurodivergent people at all.
Or I take the secret route: I just pay more than twice my rent for the diagnosis. No way I would do that! I am just a student. I hate this medical system so fucking much.
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Special interest topic:
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That's it for today, see you tomorrow, everyone!
I had not noticed that, but wow somebody remembers that song?
Awesome that you're clean. Keep going.
Methylphenidate + Duloxetine/SNRI + Clonezepam (or tranquilizer LMAO) combination is one I've seen nobody else use before so just throwing this out there... don't do anything irresponsible, obviously. Though if your psychologists are bad at dealing with neurodivergent people that's a risk factor. Used lightly. Anecdote! I switched like 7? therapists until I found the one that spotted Autism in the first 15 minutes. Maybe you can look up their names beforehand. The ones who appear in ADHD related forums or the ones that specialize in developmental disorders usually do the trick I guess. Sucks that the diagnosis is costly though. I'd ask if a formal diagnosis is necessary for the therapy to move on, like I literally wrote my answers on a PDF and sent it to my psychologist. They should be able to analyze that. But ahem. Not the professional here. I hope you'll find the appropriate help soon.
Learning languages is fun. Enculturation is highly respectable. Cheers.
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