My bf loves me and I love him back but idk why I feel like I might be not as much as he needs, not enough I mean. Makes sense to me at least like he's all the way in Britain and I'm here, he can't hug me, kiss me, freaky with me, he can't crash in my arms after a long day, he can't have me to cry on my shoulder and I can't be there to supported him the way someone in a normal relationship would. And I feel pretty useless because of that. It's all me so I'm gonna hope to think Abt it as I type and maybe figure it out. I feel pretty useless that I can't provide him with physical kinda of affection as that is one of my love languages. He doesn't seem to mind or say anything on that but I'm not sure if I'm enough as that physical aspect is meaningful in my case so I assume it is just as meaningful to him too. And I want him have everything he needs as I love him and want him to be happy and satisfied emotionally and in every way, and I feel doubtful if I am truly fulfilling him. And hence I sometimes think I should just break up with him and lose the best bf I've ever had and the person i genuinely love to let him go and be with someone who can give him everything I can't and keep him happy. It's fucked up in but I just want him to be happy, I don't want him to feel empty or grumpy or unfulfilled emotionally and if a long distance does that to him I rather take the pain for him to find happiness elsewhere, but then again i become selfish and back out of those thoughts. The thought of losing him hurts and I don't want to lose him, I still want him so bad, I want to pretty up for him and be there for him and make him happy I don't think I can let him go for that. But these thoughts of not being enough pop up sometimes and I feel so conflicted and in pain thinking about it all. I don't know what will make these thoughts stop, but I hope I don't do anything stupid. I feel like i might just. I just want to keep him happy tho, idk why it's so complicated for me .
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