Dec. 3, 2020

Described Some of my Work, Did Some Game Item Trading, Bought a Video

7:15 AM (of Friday, December 4th 2020)

Today is Thursday, December 3rd 2020 and it was a very typical day today. I fell asleep pretty late last night at around 12 AM, and I woke up this morning at a bit after 7 AM. I got 7 hours of sleep last night which I think is pretty good. This is what my time log looked like today:

  • Work 8:42
  • Work Tasks 8:42
  • Physical 1:42
  • Beat Saber 1:42
  • Intermediary 7:46
  • Preparing Food 0:04
  • Eating 0:20
  • Sleeping 7:19
  • Pooping 0:03
  • Organization 1:02
  • Journal 0:58
  • Pictures for the Day 0:04
  • School 0:54
  • Homework 0:54
  • Social Media 3:54
  • Discord 3:54


First thing I did after waking up was use the bathroom to poop, and then I took my daily photos for the day, prepared some food, and then ate breakfast. After that I worked on writing yesterday's journal which was quite longer than average, so it took me an hour to write all that.


After that work started and I continued off from yesterday's work. Anyway the "hard thing" I was working on yesterday and completed, was an "Advanced Search" feature. Basically based on a lot of different parameters, I would filter out search results from the database. Some parameters were very specific like it had to equal this value, other parameters were ranges like between this and that date, and some other parameters were open ended and they could type in anything. So combining all of these I had to get results from the database, which to me I guess it was hard to do because I haven't done work like this much and things can get tangled and etc.

Today I continued that work. I got most of the advanced search functionality completed yesterday, so what I mainly worked on today was the layout of the search results. This part wasn't so hard for me, but for some reason I kept running into an issue where the search results would appear below the rest of the page. What? Anyway this is something I needed to figure out. I couldn't figure it out even through the rest of the work day.

Trading Game Items

After work I browsed Discord for a while. I'm not playing any games, but I did "trade" for some items, though not really, with some people. I guess I negotiated some trade agreements for some items in a game, but I ended up not following through even after negotiating several good deals. There's one game item that if all the parts needed to create it were purchased individually through the official in-game stores, it probably cost $700+ for this one game item. If on the other hand, all those items were purchased through players, all those parts would probably would cost ~$70. Well I was able to negotiate with some people to get that item for $50. Was it worth it though?

I ended up declining. Was that a bad idea? I dunno. There's supposedly only 10,000 of these items that can exist if all the parts were gathered for it and created the item. That's a lot in my opinion. That doesn't feel that unique or rare at all. So far there's only been about 2000 of these completed items assembled, with the rest of the 8000 still waiting to be assembled. What will happen when those 8000 are assembled? I think the price would tank even further, right? So that's what I thought and that's why I declined in the end. It was some good deals, but I'd rather spend that $50 elsewhere.

Buying Game Land

Instead what I bought was some "land" in an upcoming game. I bought the cheapest land available which was $100. Was that a good idea? I already bought the same cheapest land available yesterday, for another $100. So far total I've spent $200 on this upcoming game. Why'd I spend so much? Well apparently there's only 1000 of these cheapest lands available, and only around 1600 total lands are for sale (the rest are exponentially more expensive, with the next land costing $500 roughly). There's 1000 of the cheapest land because it's the most common, and it's the smallest property.

Some people I've talked to have bought 50 of these cheapest lands. So they've spent $5000 on this already. Heck there are lands that cost over $5000 by themselves and some people have already bought them. I'm probably going to end up buying one more land before I'm done. I might buy the next one up for ~$500 or buy another cheapest land. The thing is I'm expecting I can sell these for more in the future once the game is released, because these lands are incredibly rare with there being only around 1600 total land properties.

The problem is that it's an upcoming game, and may or may not be released. This company might go broke before the release of the game happens. I've seen some interviews with them and they're talking about expenses. They've spent millions on game development already and they don't have any more funding, so I am not sure what's going to happen to them. But hey if their game actually makes it live, then cool I'd be a property owner in this game and might be able to sell the land for more than I purchased it for if there is appropriate demand.

These purchases were not easy. I spent hours contemplating them and watching video interviews, reading as many articles on this game and company as I can, and so on. People blindly threw tens of thousands of dollars at this already. Are they insane? I don't know how other people operate, but that seems ludicrous to me. The thing is though I'm very hyped up about this game, the graphics look pretty good and very stylistic. Yeah I might spend another $500 on this game buying the next level land. This would allow me to have my own small farm in the game. Other people that have bought tens of thousands of dollars of land can build villages. Is it worth it though? I don't know. Only the future can tell, and they're expecting game release to be 2022.

Ah yeah this is the company I did some negotiating for yesterday. I got them in touch with a higher up from another company, and this other company's products might honeslty be able to save them millions and help them earn millions too. What the Fuck do I get for doing this negotiation? Probably nothing. Probably fucking nothing. Here, I've just saved your company millions of dollars and now you can profit millions of dollars too, but yeah I deserve nothing for this (sarcasm). I've talked to both sides, and they both seem like they've come to mutual agreements. Fuck me. Give me something for this.

Playing Beat Saber

After that I played some Beat Saber on the balcony. I played for around two hours. Who knew? The time went by so fast. It felt like I was only playing for around 30 minutes to be completely honest.

There was one weird thing that happened today when playing online. In the waiting room each player stands on their own "Circle", and there are people next to you on both sides, but they're a distance away in their own "circle" as you are in your "circle". People's hands are the controller and their heads are the headset, so sometimes people will put their headset down and their controller elsewhere, and their bodies would contort weirdly, like the head would be upside down, and the hands would be in an unrealistic position.

You can technically walk anywhere, even outside your circle as long as your "Play Zone" is big enough. This guy on my right was so freaky. He left his "Circle" and came close to entering mine, which was scary as fuck to have some guy right next to you. Especially because normally you're quite a distance away, like let's say 15 meters away from them. This guy got to about 2 meters from me and it was so scary seeing them up close like that, in my personal space. Not only that, he was effing around with his controller and headset so they were going all over the place. I was so freaked out. Was this a nightmare?

I played whatever song he picked and he ended up dying. He sucked at the game, but as soon as we got back in the lobby, I kept staring at him and I was like, please don't come into my space again. He was looking at me and I thought he was going to come over, and I was so freaked out, I just ended up quitting that room. What a nightmare.

Math Homework

When I got back inside, it was already 11:23 PM, I had no idea so much time went by. I had around 30 minutes only to complete my homework, which I worked on in a rush. I did as much as I could, and I answered most of the questions, but there were some questions I missed. I hit "save" and it said 27 seconds left before deadline. Shoot. I just turned in whatever I had, and did the other questions as a "Comment" to the submitted assignment. Hopefully the professor can see and accept that comment as part of my assignment.

Apparently the math homeworks due on Thursdays account for 20% of my class grade, while the, in my opinion harder assignments, due on Wednesday only accounted for 10%. So I had to put in all my effort for this Thursday assignment and I got as much as I could done, but I wasn't able to finish with only 30 minutes to work on it. Yeah I should have worked on this earlier.

Adult Videos

I've spent a few hundreds of dollars on adult videos this year. Why? Part of my hedonistic, lazy, pleasure-seeking phase I guess. It's entertainment. I've been watching certain fetishes growing up through high school and college, and my entire adult life, but just free versions. Usually people would upload the paid videos to free sites anyway, so I could still watch them for free. But there were some videos that people didn't upload to free sites, and I coveted those. I wanted to watch them so badly but they were always behind a paywall.

Well I let my inhibitions go this year and bought a bunch of these videos I've been wanting to watch for years. I've just been looking at their pricetags of $30+ per video and that turned me off a lot of them. This year, I just felt like, whatever, let's go for it. And I did. These videos are awesome. Having the ability to pay for videos now, I get to watch exactly what I want and choose which videos I want to watch, no longer do I just have to sit behind "preview" videos.

I didn't write about buying any of these videos, even though I've been buying some videos since probably August or earlier. Well I fulfilled so many of my desires this year, it's been cool. My reaction was, wow, so that's what happens in the videos. I never expected the videos to be as good as they were. Some of these videos only had like 20 second previews and I wanted to see a lot more. In my opinion it was so worth it to buy. Now I get to see the full thing.

Tonight there was another video I have been waiting for, for a while. Between two people I really wanted to see in a video together. Like I've always been thinking, "if these two are in a video, I'm going to buy it", but video after video came out and they were never put together. There was already one video they were in together and I bought that, it was so worth it, but I wanted more. Well another one came out tonight and I immediately had to buy that. It was like $37 for the video which is very pricey, like that is quite pricey, but whatever, yolo, I think it was worth it. I had a good time with that video, whew....

Now I have a very nice video collection I'm pretty happy with. I can have endless hours of entertainment with these, although I really want to stop this habit too. It's such a waste of time and such a huge drain of energy. But wow I really liked the video that came out tonight. It's been something I have been waiting for a while. There's just one more type of video I want these two together in, and if that comes out I'm buying that too. I am running out of desires to be fulfilled though, like I have basically fulfilled them by seeing what I wanted to see with the hundreds I've spent already. I'm hoping I eventually get tired out of this and feel bored by this altogether so I can quit this activity.

Shortly after that I went to sleep. And that was my day today. This is and yesterday's entry are some of my most revealing journal entries so far. I've been mostly vague about what stuff I do on Discord, vague about what kind of work I do, vague about "messing up", etc. But here it is. I'm still quite vague on a lot of details though like the game I was talking about, the video I was talking about, and so on. I'll still keep those to myself.

Written by JustMegawatt

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Posted On Dec 08, 2020

Yeah, you've really opened up in your recent journals. I hope that means you feel comfortable and not judged for sharing. As a....uh... content provider, this is somewhat helpful to me to know what people think is too expensive and so on, so I appreciate you for that, thanks~! I won't lie I'm curious about the video lol you seem to value your time preciously, so it must have been good to be worth it

Posted On Dec 10, 2020

@iyazo Overall the video was one of the best I've seen only because I've been waiting for it for probably 1-2 years. These adult companies make videos around a certain theme and they use the same models. I've been waiting for two specific models to be used in the same video together. That's all I'm saying since it's awkward revealing exactly what you're into.

Posted On Dec 10, 2020

@JustMegawatt I get it ;) well I'm glad it was a good one then. I have no shame on the internet lol but I feel you

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