9:07 PM
Today was an alright day. I woke up at around 6 AM and did my typical morning chores. No workouts today because I did them yesterday. I decided that I was just going to fast today, because my blood pressure was still a bit high, although much lower now. In some tests I've been able to get low 130s over 80s, other times though it would go to the 140s over 90s. Much lower than the 180s over 100s that I tested for the first time I bought this smart blood pressure monitor, a day after three full days of eating nothing but chips.
I really miss those chips though, they were so good. I ate nothing but chips for three full days and I also bought a blood pressure monitor during that, and yeah I tested really high, probably from the very high sodium intake. Now it's dropped a lot, in just 2 weeks roughly, to now I would say averaging 140/88 or so. I've tested higher, and I've tested lower, but that's probably the average. So that's good. But not low enough, not yet in the normal range. So I wanted to water fast today to help get it ever lower. That was the plan, anyway.
I also walked outside in the morning, I think mainly just because I felt a bit bored. Oh, maybe a little bit energized too, because Aloe sent me another message this morning. It was around 21 hours since her last message. She sent me something like "I wish we would get to know each other better because although I do draw and paint, that's no longer what I've been practicing lately. I'm now a stylist and that's where I want to grow", in Spanish. Oh okay, I responded with something like "Oh, sorry about that incorrect suggestion. Yeah I know you are a stylist and that's where you want to grow, I'll help you grow in that in whatever way I can" in Spanish. And I also said "Did you get your car issues resolved?"
She didn't respond to the first part, but she did answer that second question, right away. Like within a minute of me asking. She responded with "No, I am annoyed by that" and I thought we would be able to chat now, so I sent another reply. "What exactly happened and what does it take to resolve it? Is there any way I can help?" and then she went offline again. We had this conversation about 12 hours ago, and she still hasn't even marked that message as read nor has she replied. I'm just assuming she's really busy and whatever. I'm kind of insecure too though and think that she doesn't care that much if she's taking such a long time to reply, making me a bit sad.
Anyway I walked outside that morning, just a lap around the neighborhood. I don't know why I did it, but yeah I did it. It's not a bad habit to start. Three laps in the morning would have been better, and something I might do for tomorrow, but I only did one lap today. I think it's great if I can fit in three in the morning, three in the afternoon, and another three in the evening. Tomorrow I have strength workouts I have to do too, so I don't know if I'll be able to make it.
For work today, I completed some work like always. It was not a bad day work-wise. I also took a break at around 1 PM or so, and I went out into the balcony here and brought my yoga mat with me, I put it on the ground, laid down on it, and had the sun directly shining on me. It was very hot today, very hot. And the sun felt good on my skin. I was shirtless, and only had shorts on, so I was getting hit by the sun practically everywhere. After a few minutes, I flipped myself over to my stomach, and then I could also see the floor.
There were a bunch of insects like tiny red mites just crawling around everywhere. I'd blow some air and they'd go flying, but then they'd come back. I'll make sure not to have my hair on the ground next time, just have everything on top of the thick yoga mat, which I didn't see them climbing.
After work which was at like 6 PM or so, I was really bored. Still no reply from Aloe. I checked my mailbox though and got a letter from my parents. I called them up about it and showed them that I received it. Afterwards I went on a huge cleaning spree. I threw out a bunch of trash, I organized a lot of things, I moved things into "storage", and I even opened up this Shark vacuum cleaner I bought, set it up, and vacuumed around. My entire apartment now looks like it did when I first moved in basically, barely anything here. It's very empty. I also washed all the dishes and cleaned up the countertops completely everywhere. Today has basically been the cleanest day this place has been in a while because I cleaned up everything.
I finished at around 8 PM, and then I was bored again. I got on Facebook, messaged a friend, said he was busy today. Still no message from Aloe, and the messages I sent are also unread, the ones that include "can I help in any way?", because I really want to. Also another insecure thing, is that she updated her profile picture and background photo earlier today. Also she made a post about selling a video game console and one person was like "I want it, read your private message" and she gave it a thumbs up and probably responded to that person, but didn't reply to me.
This is just my insecure ramblings btw, if I ever share this site with her and if she ever reads this, please let me write down my feelings about what I'm going through. They may be minor or insignificant to you, but your messages really matter a lot to me and I feel a bit neglected since I reply right away, but you don't and you don't tell me why. Especially when you are messaging other people just fine or making updates just fine... That's just me feeling insecure, so whatever.
So now it's around 9:30 PM and I'm just writing this, about to go to sleep. I feel kind of lonely I guess. I pleasured myself once today, twice yesterday, probably twice the day before. I didn't write about those times though. I'm mentioning that because pleasuring myself too much affects my mood negatively. So if I didn't touch myself, I'd be feeling extremely horny and turned on right now. Instead, I feel saddened.
Anyway I'm probably going to sleep. There's not much else really going on. That was my day today.
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