June 20, 2021

DAY 1 - Starting off with a bad note

I can see that I started my day as productive as I can and because it's Sunday and I have to do my responsibilities, first thing in the morning. I did my morning routine like I was supposed to do. I even initiated to help out for the preparation of our church because we have to clean, carry furniture aside and to help set up the screen projection for the service. My mind was not focused because I also have to prepare for the consultation for our school research. I find it quite a hassle because I am expecting this day to be a holiday. But since I have no choice I have to set aside for that. As the church progress, they were choosing children to express their thoughts of gratitude because it's Fathers Day. Though, I didn't have the chance to hear what my brother expressed on his message to my dad because of the consultation.

I am a little bit irritated because my group mates on research was not even on the consultation. I took the conversation of the consultation by myself and asked the questions that will help progress our research. But then I realized the heaviness of the weight of the research because of the work that we have to do. And because I kept thinking of the weight that led me to procrastination throughout the remaining hours of my day. I really didn't want to work or to progress the research because I can only see the weight that the research might bring me to my mental state.

But I am happy though, because I am also releasing Tiktok videos and my viewers seems to be happy about my new hair cut. I kept on thinking on maintaining my contents because I don't want to stay stagnant for too long. If it is within my power to make a lot of people happy on what I am releasing and keep them engaged then I am more than happy to do so.

I went to sleep later on at the latter part of my day and when I woke up I felt great but still, I procrastinated by watching Netflix because I kept thinking about the research again. But then I decided to progress a little bit more on my research by doing a little bit of work.

I really don't find myself that great especially I'm not good in handling my emotions. I affected my relationship with my girl because I felt bad on having a planned day tomorrow but not went exactly the way we wanted it because of immediate plans that her family wanted them to have. Because of this I eventually slept late at night and didn't have the energy to sleep early. I know that it's not her fault. But I am doing my best to keep up with the challenges of this life. I really believe that everything will workout better. I always pray for a better tomorrow for everybody and I am also thinking of being a better man for my partner.

Written by Thry14

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