Went to a local Vegfest with my parents, worked a lot, no one has it easy

10:47 PM

When asked what my favorite anime is, well, I guess it depends on what I'm watching at the time. I think there's a handful of decent anime, and the rest I dislike. I think pretty much most anime suck. I dislike anime, video games, manga, things that in general do more harm than good in terms of living a meaningful, productive life. Of course we all put our own meanings to our own lives, some people do just value mindless entertainment more than productive activities, but I do not. I consider these activities a vice that I fall prey to every now and then, a distraction to my meaning.

I read a science fiction book before going to sleep last night, a few pages of it anyway. It's one I've already read before, and it's one that was fun to read the beginning of again. I first read this book in possibly 2018, likely mid to late 2018, maybe 2019, and it had a different meaning for me back then. It's quite profound how differently I view the book now. It's about a man that gets a time traveling device, and he basically does everything possible with it, including seeing his own death.

The author of the book had an incredible insight on the value of money near the beginning, something I didn't agree with at the time. My life experiences up to that point couldn't make me understand, couldn't make me relate with the main character at all, but now I realize he feels the same way about money as I do. Maybe I feel the same way about money today, because I adopted this main character's feelings towards money from the book? It just took a while for me to feel the same way about it? Either way, we have the same exact feelings towards it. Maybe I did get this realization form this book, because I would describe it the same way, the same exact way.

I am kind of sleepy right now. It's 11:18 PM. It took me a while to write these three paragraphs, because I made a lot of revisions. I even opened the book up to confirm some things. I don't actually even want to write about this book. but I just went on a tangent. I don't have unlimited energy to just do whatever I want. I have fatigue that builds up. I did over 200 push ups today, I didn't even keep count exactly how many I did, and over 150 arm curls with a 15 pound weight with both arms. And I worked for like 5-6 hours today. I also went outside to a Vegfest with my parents. Yeah I am tired. Oh, I did 5 sets of 20 push ups today. This evening I just randomly was like, let me do 20 push ups instead of 10, and it worked, I was able to do 20 push ups, and I did that 5 times, and it wasn't hard.

So anyway, I wanted to just write about anime. I do think it's a waste of time and I do dislike anime, but I sometimes watch them, as a vice, even though I hate doing it. I can't keep awake. I am going to sleep.

7:43 AM (of Tuesday, April 26th 2022)

The anime I wanted to write about was Legend of the Galactic Heroes, it makes sense to watch the new version first, and then the old version for a more in depth story. That anime is probably one of my favorites, and if you ask me while I’m watching it, it’s my favorite. Unlike most other anime, the story for this one is actually decent.

It’s about two galactic civilizations at war with each other, one is an empire, and the other is a democratic republic nation. The main characters are people from both factions, even though they are at war with each other, they also have their own inner disputes within their civilizations. The two main main characters are Yang Wenli and Reinhard Van Lohengramm. Out of the two, I like Yang Wenli more, but my favorite character is this guy named Paul Oberstein.

Obviously the characters are fiction, and these three are only geniuses because the plot allows their tactics to always succeed, but I still like all three characters and their personalities. These three characters are my favorite because they do all that they can given their situation and limitations, and they admit they do not really want to be where they are, but they're forced through circumstances. I enjoy the dialogue of these characters and how honest they are with their situation.

11:04 PM (of Friday, April 29th 2022)

I don't think it's possible for such a character like Paul Oberstein to exist in the real world. Everything he says and analyzes turns out to be true. I think he may be the wisest character in the series, though Yang Wenli and Reinhard Van Lohengramm are also up there. They're each good at their own thing. Both Yang and Reinhard are good at tactics, they both also know a lot about politics, though I would say Reinhard is better than Yang in that regard since he's actually in the midst of politics the whole series, while Yang chooses to sit out of it.

It is possible to make guesses and predictions in tactics and strategy and politics and be right, but to be 100% right all the time like these three characters, especially Paul Oberstein, is impossible. Even Napoleon made a bunch of blunders, George Washington made a bunch of blunders, the United States made a bunch of blunders, Nazi Germany made a bunch of blunders, even Russia and Ukraine today are making a bunch of blunders in their skirmishes. It is just impossible to accurately know what the enemy is doing at all times, and even if you did, that doesn't mean you'll win against them in a confrontation.

Back to my example of someone having 20 years experience in the military since birth, having all the latest military equipment, knowing all the training and drills, being the most physically fit person on the planet, and wearing heavy armor, and they can still lose against any random untrained person with a very old gun and a lucky shot. There are videos of people livestreaming war, being out on the battlefield and shooting at enemies from afar, some people have livestreamed their deaths in these battles. It's so unexpected, one moment they're running around and shooting at an enemy, the next moment they're dead and they didn't even expect it. You need perfect vision and instant reaction time and perfect aim to do well, and even then you can't even be guaranteed to win.

So I like the intellect of these characters, and I like the story, but it's not realistic at all. What was I even getting at?

Also I've seen a lot of anime. I do think the majority of them suck. There is a lot of effort, time, and money that goes into each anime episode, there's like a hundred or so people working on every single anime episode of most anime. I just clicked on a random anime, skipped to the credits, and I counted 72 names, and that's not even including the artists in the studio, it just said "Studio Name" as if that were one person. I clicked on another anime, and stopped counting at around 120 names because I got annoyed, I estimate there to be 170 names in the credits for this one, again it also just lists studios as "Studio Name" as one person a bunch of times. Maybe that's an extra 50 people each time that's mentioned?

Probably my favorite anime opening is the one for Kokkoku. It also just has "Geno Studio" in the credits there as if that's supposed to be one person, that's probably another 70 people. I counted 32 names in the opening and one of those was Geno Studio, I don't know Japanese though so I might've counted a string of characters that wasn't even a name, so I might've been off. Okay this will be annoying, how many names does the ending credits have? Okay I counted 171 and I gave up, I am estimating there are like 250 names though. So yeah, a LOT of work and people go into making a single anime episode.

So let's say 200 people work on each anime episode. I am not knocking their work and effort and all that, but yeah, I still think most anime suck. They're fun to watch and all that, but I think most anime is cringe and just so stupid. Sorry, no offense again at all the work and effort it takes to make an anime. I just think most are dumb and a big waste of time. For an example of a really good animation story, I would say the original Toy Story and the original Finding Nemo and the original The Incredibles, all Pixar films, are the best written animation stories. Oh yeah, Princess Mononoke and Spirited Away and Metropolis and Akira, are also brilliant animes.

I would say some of the best anime series are probably Legend of the Galactic Heroes, Overlord, and Naruto. If there was a tier list, those would be S tier for me. And then some A tier animes: A Certain Magical Index, Sword Art Online, One Outs, Bungo Stray Dogs, Kuroko's Basketball.

5:41 AM (of Saturday, April 30th 2022)

Anyway I've seen a bunch of anime. Even if I haven't seen it, I'd probably heard of it. I actually pretty much hate anime as a whole since I think it's a waste of time to watch. It's okay to watch good anime I guess, like if it's just an hour or two a month. One benefit I can think of is maybe the viewer could absorb some character's personality and energy as a motivating factor in some way, though a viewer might also absorb bad traits of some characters, so it's a double edged sword. Overall I dislike anime.

So anyway, I went to a local Vegfest with my parents today. That was fun, the parking lots were pretty packed and we had to park at the top floor of a parking lot building. There were a bunch of vendors and talks going on. We didn't take too many pictures. We just ate some of the food there, and bought some stuff at some vendors. I bought a bunch of vegan stickers, one was put on my dad's laptop that arrived a few days later, and I'm saving the rest. I'll probably put two on my vehicle in Puerto Rico.

I would love for everyone to stop killing and eating animals and go vegan, that's probably my and only one wish if I had any. It's so very stupid anyone still participates in killing and eating animals today, it is easily the most harmful, most destructive, most sadistic, most unnecessary, most violent, most cruel act anyone participates in, and people participate in it without even noticing the harms they cause, completely oblivious. And people can make excuses and some arguments, but if they did a little bit of thinking and a little bit of reading, they would realize all their arguments and fears and excuses have absolutely no ground to stand on. Everything in all facets of life tremendously improve when one is vegan, from health, wealth, knowledge, motivation, everything, though life and results also depends on one's thoughts and actions.

While sitting on the grass with my parents having a meal, I ran into an elementary school classmate there, RPM who is vegan as well. He just randomly saw us and came up to us with another person along with him. We used to live in the same neighborhood growing up and I went to a bunch of his birthday parties. We both grew up in a very poor neighborhood, he has a master's degree in Computer Science today and works for a top tech company. We chat for a bit and caught up on things.

I remember ten years ago I couldn't have ever imagined I would have the amount of experience, knowledge, status, skill, and so on that I have today. I only got my Associate's Degree in computer science last year, and it took me 9 years to get it. I still haven't even seen it yet, but my parents have it somewhere. Despite that, I can already get any position I want basically. I can do anything I want. My work is fully remote so I can pretty much travel anywhere and do anything, pretty much without limits. I feel very limitless in my potential if I'm being honest, though things are still not so easy. Like, even though I am doing well, I still don't know what my future holds. Where will I be next year and what will I be doing? I hope for only good things of course, but even I have no clue.

Life is not confusing for me, but it sure is not easy. I feel like everything is kind of straightforward in life. I understand what must be done to accomplish something. Anything is possible to attain, anything is possible to do for anyone. There are some routes easier than others. Water fasting is probably the fastest healthy way to lose weight (the true fastest might be liposuction or amputation, but either aren't healthy), it sure is not easy to do though. If I could do things perfectly, I wouldn't watch a single second of anime, I wouldn't eat a single piece of junk food, I wouldn't entertain the notions of adult activities in my head. Those are probably my three vices.

There's probably other stupid things I do too, but I'm not introspective enough that it's obvious to me. It's probably stupid of me that there are some things I am not participating in at the moment too, like maybe Instagram and YouTube, like maybe I would do well in those mediums. Who knows? Or maybe there's some obvious invention or app or website idea that will be released a year from now, and it would've been obvious to anyone to have made something like that, but I don't know what it is right now, and neither does anyone. Like I think Uber was such a good and obvious idea, but hypothetically, even if I knew it was a good idea and it hasn't been created yet, would I be able to? Hmm, yes actually. I spent some time thinking about it, I have enough capability to recreate something like Uber, today. It would still not be easy at all though. Nothing is ever easy.

Even if I had the capability of doing something and full knowledge exactly of what to do to do it, it doesn't mean it's easy, like doing 100 push ups, I can now do that in under 15 minutes. But is it easy? No. It takes effort and energy and strength. It takes mental stamina too. I get tired and fatigued. But I know and have the capability to do it and I have done it, but it's not something I can easily do just because I can. I know how to walk 100 miles, and probably so does everyone, I just start here, I walk there, and I have to repeatedly go back and forth until I make it to 100 miles. But is it easy to do this? No. It takes full effort to do this. It's with every activity in the world.

Like, I'm an expert in some subjects. If someone were to hire me to do a job or give advice based on my expertise in that subject, I have to think about the best way to solve that problem, whatever it is, based on my knowledge and experience, and then I have to put in effort and energy to do whatever it is. Sometimes solutions will come easily and instantly if I had experienced similar problems and solved them before, but not when it's more complicated. Like let's say I'm hired to solve the problem "1+1", that's easy for me because I've done that before a bunch of times. But how about "111111+1111" then I have to spend a little bit extra thinking about it. That's an easy example, but it applies for any subject more abstract than that.

Then let's say the solution of how to solve a problem to me comes pretty easily, like let's say the job is writing the solution to 1+1 on a blackboard. That's pretty easy to do and I have full knowledge of how to do it. But then let's say the blackboard was 3 miles away, down this straight path. Then I have to put in effort and energy to travel that distance to write the answer on the blackboard. Even though I fully know how to walk 3 miles and the solution came really easily to me, I still have to put in effort to complete the task, even though it's easy!! Anyway I'm just talking about how even though I might fully know how to do something and have all the experience and everything I need to do that something, that doesn't mean I would do it, just because of the effort it takes to do that something.

Like, I do think I have limitless potential to do anything, and I have ideas of what I want, but it is not easy, not easy at all to do anything. I never think of myself as a victim because everyone has the same limitations. Everybody. My friend RadicallyWild who lives offgrid and has no income, who is vegan and grows his own food to stay alive, who is extremely broke with homeless levels of poverty, who drives the most beat up car I've ever seen where literally none of the doors open and he has to go inside trunk to get in, it's missing a radio, missing back seats, has exposed metal and rust all over, literally the most beat up car ever, and people have the audacity to call him a "colonizer". This is a pejorative term usually applying to wealthy, rich, white Americans who buy up millions of dollars of property on the island, and move in speaking English the whole time and do nothing to learn about the culture and language. Even if there were people like that, one's life problems shouldn't be blamed on them.

It's pretty crazy. Just because he's from New York originally, some people say he's "colonizing the island". I don't even think he can afford a $400 ticket to fly out of the island, I don't even know if he has $100, literally everything he owns he found in the trash. He spent years of his life literally just cleaning up the beaches, and he gets called a "colonizer"? Why? That's victim mentality. Nothing is easy for him. He works at least like 4 hours a day on his farm for survival and doesn't wear a shirt or shoes while doing it, and it takes energy and effort for him to do things.

We live in an extremely egalitarian society where anyone can do anything. There's no limitations. Everything is possible for anyone. People blame problems on the government, their wealth, their health, their appearance, their race, their gender, and whatever other excuses people make. They have to realize that no one has it easy. I can imagine even someone with perfect genetics and a perfect family background with a wealthy inheritance would have a hard life. There's no way they wouldn't. No one has it easy. Even Dan Bilzerian who posts pictures up of what people think the lifestyle they want to live is like, has I imagine a pretty tough life with its own set of problems and challenges.

There is this kid from my high school who likely comes from an extremely wealthy family, he drove Ferraris while going to high school, he has great genetics too, he's white and is around 6'5" maybe, he has over a million subscribers on YouTube, a net worth probably of more than $10 million likely initially from family but he has his own income from YouTube now. He probably gets with a lot of women and with far less effort than most other guys. An earlier version of me would've been jealous. I would've thought "omg this guy has everything waa waa." Well it's true he has a lot of things that I don't have and that I desire, but he has his own set of problems and challenges he has to deal with, likely more and tougher than the problems I have to deal with. He spends most of his time on YouTube making videos about cars, driving fancy cars, but I don't even want to do any of that or have any of those cars he has.

I have another friend too who also has like a $10 million net worth, and this guy is like 6'8" or something, one of the tallest people I have encountered in my entire life. I can't really say, but I don't think he's super happy with life. Who knows? I've been to his house a few times, hung out with him a few times. He's a very cool and nice guy. I was jealous of him earlier, but I realized we all have our own set of problems and challenges, and he has his own too. Getting his net worth to that level took a lot of effort and risk and challenges he had to go through and face, he smokes and drinks probably to de-stress.

In contrast to that, I have friends who are not tall and not rich. I have a male friend that is 5 feet tall and makes $50k a year, and he is very dark skinned. In some ways, he has it far tougher than these other two people, like he can't afford as much, probably has very little success with women, probably gets made fun of for his height, uhh. Well I kind of just sort of disproved myself, I think in many ways it would be a way harsher and tougher life living as him than as either of the other two, but he still has full freedoms to do everything. He is actually already married too, so arguably he has more success with women, more than the other two who are not married despite their genetics and net worth, but they also might not even want to get married and are happy being bachelors. Anyway he still has full freedom and power and everything in our society to do as he pleases, like he has his own home already too. It might be hard for him to become an NBA player or NFL linebacker, but I don't think it's impossible. I also think we should set goals in areas that are more realistic for us though.

There's the ex-boyfriend that AJN told me about. This ex was disabled in a wheelchair, but he was extremely wealthy and powerful, more powerful than the two white guys I mentioned earlier. He was also not white and lived in America, and I think he has always been disabled since birth, I don't know though, I never met him, just heard stories. He didn't grow up in a wealthy family, probably opposite of that, he probably grew up in poverty. He became wealthy and successful from his actions though, not sure what he did exactly, but he became extremely wealthy, enough that he bought her a $2 million house as a gift for free. She says that like a week or two in their relationship, he bought her a $100k Mercedes as a gift.

Anyway, the point I was getting at, is that anything is possible for anyone. I don't really care to argue on this topic, people just victimize and limit themselves of their potential if they think otherwise. I am not going to limit myself. I think that everything is possible for me, and therefore it is. It's really that simple. Even if I tried to think of anything limiting to me, I can't really think of anything.

I don't really want to drive fancy cars, I don't want to be in the NBA or NFL, I don't want a mansion or a fancy house. I want to make money only for the sake of being able to influence and change the world for the better with that money, to use that money primarily to donate to vegan charities, I want the whole world to stop killing and eating animals, to realize how unnecessary and sadistic and cruel the act of killing and eating animals is, and for the whole world to go vegan. I want to become knowledgeable, skilled, powerful, only for the sake of saving lives. I want fame and influence, only for the sake of saving animals. I wouldn't use my power for any other way other than for good.