9:39 AM (of Thursday, May 19th 2022)
Today is Wednesday, May 18th 2022 and it was a good day today. I’ve noticed that I would have some days like yesterday (Tuesday) when I would spend it hedonistically doing nothing at all productive and then the next day I would have a very productive day like today.
I woke up at around 5 AM and I got some tasks done in the morning. Continuing from yesterday’s entry, I decided it wasn’t worth it to keep the mini fridge plugged in for the next two weeks when it only had a quarter amount of juice in a container and some plant based cheese, so I threw that out and unplugged it. I washed the dishes for the final time and cleaned up the sink and counters. I’m only gonna be drinking water this whole time so no point in using the dishes for a while. I’m planning on fasting until the end of the month.
After that I basically worked the entire day. It would be really boring to describe, but I did some work for Stealth Launch and Vegpal today, mainly Vegpal. It was fun. I changed the profile picture previews to a rounded rectangle and we talked about if the old one was better. I got some new assignments for Stealth Launch and I basically just looked over it today and attempted a bit of the first task.
I managed the interns again today. This is one of the few times in my life I’ve had a leadership position. We do morning scrums and stand ups together where we talk about what we are doing for the day, I give them assignments if they don’t have any. After that they work the rest of the day and post things in chat if they need anything. At the end of the day they post about what they did and what they learned that day, I try to help them out by giving them development advice and things like that after reading what they have tried and attempted.
I hope that I am a good leader but I don’t really know how to be one. My parents have been extremely passive with me my entire life, letting me literally have full reign of it. They did not push me to study or be anything or do anything at all. No one was even home after school, I just get off the bus alone and live at home alone until like 7 PM when my parents got back, I’m also the only child. During that time I would probably just play games until they got back. Huge waste of time.
Somehow I accomplished some decent things like I would be an elected officer of some clubs like Science Olympiad and FBLA. Those were the two biggest clubs for me but there’s probably others that I don’t even remember now. Oh yeah I had some leadership positions in Boy Scouts as well and I got the Eagle Scout rank, which is like something only 1% of Boy Scouts get.
I was also elected to be part of the student government. There were 15 other students that gave their speeches, I rapped mine on stage in front of 400+ students in my grade and became one of the popular kids from that day on. I also somehow got honors in every class I took and I had like a 3.96 GPA when I graduated or something. I don’t know where my graduation and final grade papers are but they are somewhere. Maybe gone. Maybe my parents have them. I don’t know.
So yeah I had full reign basically and for some reason I just accomplished this stuff, like why? What motivated me or pushed me to do these things? It’s weird too, if I am asking myself these questions then no one else would really know. My parents pretty much did not tell me to do anything and were just totally passive, as if they didn’t care about me, but they did a lot. I don’t know if this would be my own parenting style, but maybe it would be the best. I don’t know. I just know that growing up this way, I accomplished a lot in my life. Like, basically more than most other people given the same opportunities and circumstances. I wasn’t even born in the U.S. and lived in the cheapest and “most ghetto” apartments growing up, where everyone was a minority and most lived on government subsidies. Somehow I got good grades, somehow I was able to drop out of school and get a great job, somehow I was able to do well in pretty much everything I did. I think we all have the same opportunities and circumstances. There is nothing that I can do that no one else can do, and nothing that someone else can do that I can’t ever do.
I spent a lot of time reading today. Instead of watching anime, I just read news and other articles. Lots of drama and dumb stuff. Politics is just drama involving large populations. None of it affects my life, but I like keeping informed. It is a huge waste of time too, but probably at least marginally better than watching anime.
At night I messaged Wahl and replied to her messages. She asked for them, so I sent her some food pictures from the vegan restaurants we have here. I have been fasting the whole day so seeing these pictures made me a little hungry, especially the açaí bowl and dragon fruit bowls. Those things are insanely addicting and my favorite foods in the world right now probably. They only have good açaí bowls here I think, I tried them at Robeks when I was in VA and that was the first and last time I ordered those there, nowhere near as good as the ones here. Their smoothies are much better though, there is a La Frutera near me but I still like Robek’s smoothies more. My favorite smoothie place in VA is Smoothie King.
Anyway replying to her was fun, I hope she enjoyed my messages.
I’m kinda feeling tired of work. It’s just repetitive stuff every day. Even though I am good at what I do, it still takes effort. Like I pretty much know how to program any app or website or whatever, but it still takes effort. Like it’s still going to take me hours and hours of typing, researching, testing, all that stuff, and concentration and thinking. None of it comes easy to me, even though actually sometimes it does, like, it still takes time and lots of work. Like I know how to walk 1 mile, everyone does, that doesn’t mean they can do it in 1 second or even 1 minute! Even though I know all this computer stuff, it takes work still.
I am feeling sort of tired of it. Maybe. I don’t know. I just have so much work to do.
I also did my homework tonight. There was a graded exam with 20 multiple choice questions and I got a 90% on it after studying for a few minutes. Yeah. I didn’t spend any other time this whole week until like an hour before the exam closes to study for it, and still got a decent grade, wow. It’s health psychology class and pretty easy to get a good grade in I guess. If it were some harder course, no way could I procrastinate this much and still get a decent grade. I’ve dropped out of many technical classes after flunking the first graded exam, since that’s within the window of dropping out.
For the homework discussion assignment, we had to share a story of what happened when someone like a relative got some disease and what their interpretation, assessment, and coping is. Or some fancy words like that. Basically about how they felt and reacted to the whole thing, based on psychology after being diagnosed. I wrote about Steve McQueen, the king of cool, since I wrote about him in Yesterday’s (Tuesday’s) entry too. He worked out 2 hours a day and was a rugged and grungy looking, very fit and had a great sense of fashion, that’s why he was the King of Cool. He got cancer and tried a bunch of various things to cure it, spending $40,000 or more a month (equivalent of $130,000 today) and none of it worked. Super tragic. All this stuff is on Wikipedia. I tied all that into psychology and stuff that we had to read about for that week like “hardiness” and “social context” and other stuff like that.
That was pretty much my day today.
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