Monday Monday Monday

My time to do all my special interest things is first thing in the morning, plus, my organs don’t start working till I’ve had at least 3 servings of warm h2o, and then… I wait🤷‍♀️  So while I’m waiting for my body to work, I’ll prep my lunch, tackle any last minute cleaning to keep me in check for the week, do my journaling, drawing, painting, crocheting, whatever is calling my name really. My girl Meggles needs a ride to work for 8am every day and I’m it! I’m her ride which cuts my morning time from 6-9:30 to 6-7:30 I lose 2 hours, which stresses me out HUGEEEE. 

😫I NEED MANY HOURS A DAY😫ALL FOR ME AND MY CREATIONS! And i need it done BEFORE work. because after work??? my brain is mushy mush and i melt into the stratosphere🫠🫠so I MUST be accomplished before hand. 

On that end: I found that the hardest part of accomplishing tasks for me was always the beginning! Just getting started, with ANYTHING. I learned about the Pom method. I use this method for starting SOME things. So Why not all?? I ask myself this all the time, while I set here wanting to do so many things. And in the indecision I waste more time, So much time, until eventually nothing gets done. this Pom timer method is done in 25 minute increments but even that is too much at times. So what i did? I do things in 2-5 minute increments. Even 2 minutes is better than none. And then I can increase in one minute increments every Sunday so I’m always increasing in my capacity. Always expanding, no matter how slow🤷‍♀️ movement is movement, am I right? So that’s MY method. And still, there is sooo much Im just not doing. The glitching started when I went back to work. My workdays are reserved 100% as “workdays” ONLY.  It’s way too overstimulating for me. Having to be “engaged” with people for hours takes all I have and it’s exhausting. So my days off during the week are set aside for all appointments for myself and Mayah. On my appointment days, that’s all I can manage. That, and meals, including prep and cleanup. And that would be a very busy day for me. My weekends are suppose to be mine. But I have friendships. Three to be exact, that I try to be a part of at least once per weekend. I’ve got other friends but there’s no way I could possibly keep in touch with all the people that are dear to me. Sunday night rolls around and feel like I’m finally just getting off the rollercoaster and this morning, Monday morning, the ride starts back up again, with no time to breath or rest between stops. I feel dizzy much of the time. It causes me inner distress not being able to do my art and writing because I dont have the energy for it by the time afternoon hits. I’m always so dam tired and my brain just can’t. 

SIDENOTE:

the picture is of a license plate that my daughter and I saw on our way to grandmothers house for our birthday party. It was my favorite license plate, and wish I had come up with it myself! I may have to create my own vanity plate, separating me from the human race👽👽👽