Short Term Memory

10:32 PM

There was this image I opened up on my computer earlier today, it was of a 4chan green text story. Basically a ridiculous story on this anonymous forum website called 4chan. I read the whole thing, the story was 18+, it just had some inappropriate things in it, so I don't want to post it here. It was some guy in a neighborhood, and said some crazy things happen at night time. It's a just really dumb and inappropriate story. Anyway, I read the whole thing, and I laughed at the ridiculousness of it all at the end. That was this morning.

Just a few minutes ago, I opened up my computer again, and that image came up, of that ridiculous story. The image was just of some text by the way, so it was a screenshot of someone posting that ridiculous story, it didn't have anything else in it. Around 12 hours has passed since I last read it. And guess what? I counted, I had to read 53 words before I could remember the whole story. The story is probably, let me just put it into a word counter. 365 words total. So I had to read through around 1/7th of the entire story to remember the story.

The paragraph above is 108 words to compare. So basically the whole story was 3 of the above paragraphs long.

When I started reading, I was thinking, "what is this story about?" and I didn't even remember that I read it this morning!!! I completely forgot about it entirely. Isn't that ridiculous? So our memories are pretty weak. From playing memory games from several brain training apps, I am in the top 99th percentile for memory (and every other category). So I think that just goes to show we do not have such a strong memory for things. Or maybe we just instantly forget things that don't matter, like this random 4chan green text story.

Also, I posted a new photo of me on my social media last night. It was of me shirtless and flexing my muscles. I am overweight now but my arms are huge. I was complimented 4 times, 2 by women, and 2 by men. Different women from before!! I didn't get called "hot" or a "cutie" this time, but "ripped" and "you look good" or something mild like that. That was great :) So great. I was so elated by this today.

Maybe a week or two ago, I started talking to someone new. We will probably be dating in the future. We are both looking for long term partners.

Also AD sent me his real name, his first name. He is the guy suffering from PFS that I have written about before. He started injecting all sorts of different drugs and has experienced some recovery I would say. He says today is the best he had felt in weeks. I also sent him my first name, real name, "Megg." He asked for my telegram and I gave it to him. He sent me a message and I responded back. He started sending voice messages, and I responded with one.

He complimented me on my voice. His own voice is extremely deep now, due to injecting 800mg of testosterone daily. His voice is much deeper than mine, but mine is pretty deep too. He complimented me on my voice, we both complimented each other on our voices. I told him that I got complimented a few times by women on my own voice, and that he will get complimented on his, and he says he knows, he already gets complimented on his voice as well.

He is feeling some emotions now. I made him laugh a few times. I told him some jokes. He laughed out loud at them, sending voice messages of him laughing. So funny. I am remembering some of what I did to make him laugh, and they were pretty funny. The jokes require a lot of context and they are adult humor, so no one else would get them. Explaining a joke ruins it anyway, a joke doesn't become funny after being explained, it becomes more like a solved riddle, satisfied that you know the answer, but then it's not funny anymore.

He sent me videos of his place and how his place was a mess. His life was completely changed. Seriously. He said he used to vacuum and clean every day. Oh, the crazy part is he used to work out for 3 hours a day. DUDE. I have friends that say this too, that they work out for 3+ hours when they go to the gym. I cannot even imagine working out for that long. I mean wow. He says he did 1 hour of swimming, 1 hour of weight lifting, 1 hour of stretching and other miscellaneous workouts, every day. How does anyone even do that?

Oh yeah, his entire life was changed. He was about to be married. Relationship gone. He had emotions and ability and motivation. Gone. He has PFS or Post Finasteride Syndrome. He actually has never used finasteride, so it's weird we call it that. He took these drugs in excessive amounts: minoxidil, saw palmetto, ashwagandha, lion's mane, an SSRI (15 years ago), and pygeum. Any of these things could have caused him to crash and develop the issues he has now where he has no emotion (anhedonia or emotional blunting), his bones shrank, skin became very stretchy, he has zero motivation, can no longer do adult activities (I don't want to go into more detail) he has a lot of physical and mental issues too, just all of them, if you were to list them all they would be 100+ symptoms.

Everyone also thinks he is on drugs now. Just crazy. But yeah we were talking for a lot of the day today. I guess I should reply with voice messages to him back. I only did it once, and he complimented my voice, said it was deep, and said I sounded American, that he couldn't tell I was Asian. Yeah I grew up in the States, spent 20 years there, so I have adapted the local language and dialect fluently.

Also it only took around 2 years for me to become fluent in English and get straight A's in all of my English classes and writing assignments, surpassing native English speakers, seriously. I remember in 5th grade, that was my 2nd year speaking English, and my teacher was giving me a perfect grade on the paper, and another student was getting a worse grade, and he asked "how long have you been speaking English for?" and I said "two years" and we were all cool in this classroom, but he was like "wow, and you only speak English?" referring to this other student, and he said "yeah" and then did some light insulting of him. Everyone was cool in that classroom, we all talked like we were best friends with the teacher, I miss those days.

Anyway, yeah! That's basically all that's been happening the past few days. Very cool! Good development!!