July 27, 2020

A Fast Day With Chronic Illnesses

This was one just one of those days that seemed to fly by and before you knew it was over, and you didn't actually do anything or get anything done.

I woke up around 10am and went downstairs to make some coffee. That already put me off because there were dishes everywhere. I told the oldest daughter who was down there getting breakfast or something for her son to empty the dishwasher since most of the stuff in it was hers (she bought a bunch of plates and cups from Dollar Tree the other day) and the dirty dishes were mostly hers from her picnic over the weekend. I was just super annoyed because I had loaded the dishwasher so that there were only a few things left on the counter last night. Get up and the counter is completely covered in dishes (some belonged to the 17yo who cleared out her room earlier).

Drank my coffee and went to get another cup. Daughter is upstairs. Dishes not done. Me very, very annoyed. I went back upstairs and put something on Netflix and focused on my knitting to try and forget about how annoyed I was. Next thing I know, my husband is coming in. He gets home around 3pm. I don't even remember all what happened the hours before that besides the knitting. I think the kids popped in and out. The baby was left a couple times for me to watch while my daughter did "something."

I went back to my knitting, but then, my husband brings me a burger. I didn't ask for any food, but it was pretty good despite having nothing on it but cheese and pickles (plus condiments). I had planned to run to the store when he got home to pick up tomatoes and stuff to make actual burgers for dinner. When I was done eating, he offered to drive me to Rite Aid because I wanted to get some things that Walmart didn't have. While driving over there, plans changed so we went to Dollar Tree instead.

I got some cute little notebooks, more index cards and a couple other things I had been needing from there forever. Then I stopped at Grocery Outlet next door to see about the tomatoes and other produce I needed. And next to those two stores is Walgreens so I popped in there to see if they had what I had planned to get at Rite Aid.

Between eating and shopping, I was pretty worn out when we got home. I just wanted to chill in the cool AC (it was nearly 100F while we were outside), watch Netflix and munch on my potato chips. Of course, my son had other plans because he got kicked off the computer by one of his sisters. I figured he wouldn't want to watch Kipo and the Age of Wonderbeasts so I put Voltron on. I had wanted to introduce him to the show for a while but wasn't really sure he'd get all the humor.

He wasn't super keen on it either but agreed to watch the first episode (although he balked at it being a full hour long) and if he didn't like it, we'd watch something else. But he liked it and wanted to watch the next one. We were in the middle of that episode when I paused to go warm some dinner for myself. I remember it was 7pm because my husband was going to bed earlier than usual so I was trying to be quick and quiet as I got my food.

I stopped at the front door to see if the cats wanted in/out and heard my very loud (obnoxiously loud) fan shut off just as I opened the door. A moment later my 10yo is on the stairs saying there's something wrong with my fan. It would figure. I need the fan to run 24/7 to drown out all of the other noise in the house because the walls and floors are paper thin (seriously, my husband sleeps in the living room because he snores and with the fan off, I can still hear him snoring through the floor).

While I was on the porch, lamenting the probably death of my nearly-new fan (got it in March after the last one died), a guy up the hill hollered down to see if our power was out. HA! My fan was not broken--we just lost power.

Of course, losing power in a heatwave isn't the greatest, but at least my fan wasn't broken. So many neighbors came out onto their porches to see if it was just their power. Nope--whole neighborhood was out (I checked). Me, 10yo and 17yo decided to wash the car to bide our time. It was still 95F at 7pm but the water spraying every where felt nice, especially with the breeze. I still got sunburned, though.

I think it was around 8pm when the power came back on. I stayed out talking to the 17yo a bit while she used the hose to wash the moss off the sidewalks then went inside, changed, and had just settled down to continue watching Voltron with the 10yo when the power went out again. Ugh. Like I think we watched a whole 30 seconds before it all went off.

Luckily, it only lasted about 20 minutes that time and hasn't gone off again.

We watched a couple more episodes of Voltron then 10yo insisted on watching Charlotte's Web. No idea why. I've never read the book or seen any of the movies. We watched the 2006 version with Dakota Fanning. It was cute. I made him go to bed when it was over because I also needed to get this journal done. But, really, I need to get to bed, too.

The oldest daughter starts her new job tomorrow and also has to work a shift at Dollar Tree. She was clearing out the crib (she doesn't use) to put in my room because from now on, the baby sleeps in my room while she works her overnight shift at the plastic place.

Her plan for tomorrow that she informed me about at 10pm is to get up whenever the baby wakes up (around 9am) and hand him off to me to feed and do all that regular morning stuff so she can sleep some more because she has to leave for her first job at noon (it's a 4 mile walk). Then she'll come home whenever, sleep some more then go to her second job which starts at 7:30pm. My husband usually goes to bed at 8pm so I'll be putting the baby to bed and getting up with him in the morning because she'll get home at 8:30am most likely and be utterly exhausted and want to sleep until she has to be back to work later in the day.

I can't begin to explain how much I don't like this plan. I cannot take care of a baby all day. I'm exhausted late at night. The baby doesn't have a routine of sleeping in his bed so I'm going to have to train him because he's not sleeping in my bed. It's going to be a long freaking day. I have to do all those dishes my daughter didn't do. I have to cook dinner because we're finally out of leftovers and everyone is annoyed I'm not cooking. I have to babysit and spend time with the 10yo and it's just way too much to think about.

I used to do this stuff but with five small kids. When the oldest was 10, the other kids were 9, 8, 4 and an infant (younger than my grandson). I took care of everything every day. But not anymore.

I just don't know how I'm going to make it through the day. Ugh. Guess I better get to bed then.

Written by justanotherjen

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