Dec. 4, 2020


I was pretty busy today. It was a good day and I got a lot done. Unfortunately I woke up drenched in sweat again. The temperature in my room seemed fine, it's just my body getting overheated. I really think it's a side effect of medicine I'm on, I take so many different things... I need to remember to call in an order for a few of my medications which I'm running low on. For some reason my pharmacy always gets them ready too soon, before my insurance is willing to pay for them, then they get put back in stock for sitting too long, then I need to wait longer to get the medicine, it's a bit ridiculous.

I went out today and did fairly well on my own. Michael drove me to cure and I got more weed for Jena and I. I was so bummed, I was about to checkout online when making my reservation and they sold out of the thing I wanted most and was going to get for both of us. I took a while deciding then because nothing was really as good. The cart that I popped in today, Chunky Diesel, is ok. Has the typical sour diesel taste but it's very light, not hard hitting enough for me. Maybe would take the edge off anxiety, but not potent enough to get me to sleep or focus either way... I hope the other one I got will be better. That one is Pamelina x Pre 98 Bubba Kush. Bubba on its own is pretty good for sleep so I might switch to that one and try it tonight since I'm also in pain and really want to go to sleep soon. (I just popped it in and tried it, right off the bat starting to feel my muscles unclench and soften)

I met my reading goal early this week by reaching chapter 32/36 of Seven Black Diamonds by Melissa Marr. I plan to still read more this weekend if I can focus enough. I had to stop and do something else distracting (writing, hi) because of the pain. I'm trying to keep my back straight and not give in to the urge to curl over in pain, but it's tough. I'll try putting on the gel I was prescribed for that. It's basically a topical aspirin, but it does help somewhat. I was going to hop into the shower, but someone got there before me and I'm in no mood to take a cold shower. That might even make my pain worse.

Anyway, I'm glad I got a lot done today. Did my exercising and yoga even though I wasn't really feelin it today. Went out to a few stores. Got groceries and really ridiculously expensive printer ink... but I need it so I can print labels when I start selling my belongings off to try and earn more money... I'm pretty sure I miscounted my money so I'll have to check what the damage is later. I hope I didn't go through my whole budget. I feel like I did even though a lot of it was covered by food stamps or a gift card I had.

My girlfriend said a package for me should arrive tomorrow! I love when she sends me things. It's a mix of fun and practical. Her mom helps and throws some things in too- she's really nice, even if she and my girlfriend don't always get along when it comes to certain things.... I wonder what she would do if she knew we've been dating for like.... a couple of years. She's very religious, her husband was a pastor, so you can imagine. she's strangely fine with me being a trans guy though I guess? She probably thinks we're just "gals bein pals!" Who knows. I haven't been allowed to actually have her visit in over a year, not just because of covid. Her mom really did not like my old roommate- to be fair, he was a dick and was acting like a rotten child the whole time she was at my old house.

Ugh. Jon. To think I was thinking about that guy the other night and how I miss how simple life used to be. Then I remember how fucked up it really was and I'm glad that I'm out of there. It's probably better for me since I don't have someone controlling my entire life like he was. I can actually see my friends now. Speaking of which Tame/Brett wants to come hang out soon. I need to make a new magic the gathering deck so we can play. I like him a lot. He's a really soothing person to be around in comparison. I have a feeling he just sees me as a friend though... that's fine, just keep my expectations low and never be disappointed lol

Written by iyazo

Log in to Like
Log In to Favorite
Share on Facebook
Share on Twitter

You must be signed in to post a comment!