July 17, 2021

How to actually crush the fears of starting and be in tune with success

Laziness, fatigue, distractions, or procrastination. Don’t get it wrong, it all boils down to fear.

At the beginning of this year, I read a book called “Do the Work” by Steven Pressfield. A great practical book that I would recommend to anyone starting anything, it talked about Resistance and how to overcome it.

In the book, he acknowledges that resistance can take many forms and are usually the ones at the top of the article, fatigue, procrastination, embarrassment, between others. Well, I want to argue that all of this comes from different types of fears and the mind playing games with us.

Photo by Majestic Lukas on Unsplash

Yes, I hear you already. Fatigue may come from not being having healthy habits, procrastination from all the distractions that we are exposed to, and embarrassment is just human nature.

Ok, I agree with you too, but, more often than we think, the mind plays tricks and sends us these waves of resistance mainly because of the fear of improvement and change which usually lead to success.

Some fears, and their phobias, that appear when starting anything are:

  • The fear of what people may think (Agoraphobia): Sells, pitch presentations, marketing your brand, or worst, yourself. Basically presenting anything to the world triggers this fear.
  • The fear of not knowing what to do next (Xenophobia): In essence, starting anything is walking to the unknown, even by working in your expertise area you’ll always find something new.
  • The fear of reaching out of your comfort zone (Discomfort): This one is just like an introvert that has to talk to customers daily or an extrovert to sit down and plan strategists for hours straight.

All of them are well-known fears we all must overcome. But the fear of success has a little bit of all of them together.

What happens when you succeed, happiness, fulfillment, and then what? You cross to a mysterious land, usually never thought of as you were focused on getting there.

Most likely in your success, you’ll be recognized by many people or some few important people for you. But what will happen if after that you fail, you’ll fail not only yourself but also to the people you are exposed to now.

And of course, a new place, more discomfort. A promotion, a business milestone or your first 1K followers -whatever platform, you chose-, means discomfort on a new level.

Nobody is safe from this type of fear.

Sometimes the path that brought you there prepares you mentally for the next step and the next one and the next one. Most of us will find this fear while starting a business, a new hobby, or just a simple new-year goal.

The interesting thing about this fear is that creates a very subtle resistance almost at a sub conscience level. If you are feeling something like

  • Fatigue or sleepiness but you had a good time sleep.
  • Falling for distractions and regretting even when you are doing it.
  • Finding excuses to delay that call or sending that email.

Stop right there and recognize that it might be this conspiracy from all of these fears together.

Well, best of luck, cheers… JK

To be honest, it’s hard for me to give advice on something I’m struggling with. It doesn’t stop me to write about it but the best, and probably the only, advice I can come up with right now is an ancient Greek saying:

KNOW THYSELF

Photo by Natalie Parham on Unsplash

Not an easy task, though. Benjamin Franklin wrote, “There are three Things extremely hard, Steel, a Diamond, and to know one’s self.”

This is also a huge theme for another article, but by being on the path of finding and learning yourself you can see clearly why are you doing what you are doing and overcome those fears because of it.

I’m going to add here some of the best advice I really loved by the Forbes Coaches Council:

1. Remember: Some Of The Best Things Happen When You’re Uncomfortable

2. Do Small Activities To Challenge Yourself

3. Turn It Into A Learning Experience

4. Know Yourself (see!)

5. Take three deep breaths.

6. Perform Research To Get A Handle On Fears (not too much though)

7. Become Familiar With Discomfort

8. Clearly Visualize Success

9. Embrace a role or a capable alter ego of yourself

10. Don’t Go At It Alone

Ask yourself the hard questions and learn about yourself, what does success is for you, and most importantly, why this definition of success works for you.

Do it with full honesty and you’ll see a clearer path to overcome your fears.


https://my-dear-rookie.medium.com/how-to-actually-crush-the-fears-of-starting-and-be-in-tune-with-success-d7b5a1e78595


Written by johanam

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