Sept. 4, 2021

Back at it?

It's been a while since I made an entry. Nearly a year. Honestly, it's mostly because the keyboard on my laptop is broken. The W, S, and X keys don't work, so every time I need one of those letters, I have to use the mouse to press them on the onscreen keyboard. For someone that used to type 75+WPM, it's absolutely maddening.

The keys started to act up last September and got worse and worse until they stopped working 90% of the time in December. Since then, I've barely written anything because it either takes forever, and I get frustrated or it comes out as gibberish with lots of letters missing.

I finally decided to replace the keyboard and even had a new keypad delivered, but that ended up being a bust. The first screw I needed to removed, stripped and wouldn't come out. Last night, I gave up and ordered a wireless keyboard that I'll just have to set on top of the laptop (it'll be here Monday). It'll have to do. Everything in my life is always broken. The chair I'm sitting on is being held up by books because the leg broke off. We got the chair used 11 years ago and it will probably be 20 years before I replace it. And it will probably be at least five years before I can justify replacing the laptop.

Outside of computer issues, I've finally started to get my health on track. I found a new psych doctor last February. We've tried some different meds and finally hit on one that seems to work. At the least, I'm up by 7am every morning no matter when I go to bed (was sleeping until nearly noon most days before that).

I also got a referral for a sleep specialist and now have a c-pap machine to help with sleep apnea. I don't use it enough, though. Partly because I usually only get 5 hours of sleep a night now and partly because the mask only covers my nose, and my allergies have left me unable to breathe a lot this summer even with decongestants.

And most recently, I got my new primary care doctor to get blood work done to see if my anemia was returning. No surprise... it was. I'm back to taking iron pills. I found some that don't make me sick. Can't tell if they're working or not, though. I guess my craving to chew ice (usually the first sign I'm anemic again) is slowly going away.

Things aren't perfect. I still have chronic fatigue. It's not as bad as it was, but I still get worn down so easily. I can usually bounce back a little quicker Most days anyway. I miss being able to do things without being completely exhausted and needing a nap after.

Every day it's up and down. If I have a good day where I have a bunch of energy and am awake all day, then the next I will surely crash and need a three-hour nap in the middle of the day and just drag, unable to really do much. It never fails. I'm still learning to read my body to know what I can and can't do each day.

On an unrelated note... my kids are finally back in school. They had been home since March 13, 2020. It's weird not having them bugging me all day long. But also nerve-wracking with the amount of COVID in our area. Especially with my eleven-year-old that can't be vaccinated yet (the fifteen-year-old is fully vaxxed). So far my family has been lucky. We've only had a few colds over the last two years. No one we know has had COVID, let alone died from it. My three daughters and myself are all vaccinated. My husband, two sons, and grandson are not (the younger son and grandson are too young; the other two don't care).

All I can do is my best.

Written by justanotherjen

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