Oct. 20, 2026

the trees

I have decided to name the trees.

  • Cooper’s tree, lord of the forest (“Cooper”): Ruler of the association. Holds the yearly Council of the Trees in the gazebo.
  • King Pine: Leader of the evergreen faction. A rabblerouser, full of bluster and bravado. Cooper’s great rival. Styles himself as “King Pine,” but is not a real king (and may not even be a pine, I can’t tell my evergreens apart).
  • Winterberry: The gnarled tree out the back door that profusely drops red fruit in winter.
  • the wonky tree (“Wonk”): The tree where the trunk does a nearly 90-degree turn and continues perpendicular to the ground. Remarkably, other branches pick up the slack, and the tree has a nearly normal overall silhouette in summer.
  • the slanted tree (“Slant”): The tree out the back door that is normal in nearly all aspects, except it slants like 5 degrees off vertical.
  • Mushroom: The small dead tree on the hillock. The day after I noticed it was dead, I went outside and saw the ground underneath it speckled by small white mushrooms. Were they there before? I don’t know. The next time I went out, they were all gone.

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