I think I'm gonna finally call back the sleep study center. I've gotten to the point of exhaustion where my body does not have the energy to process hunger cues. I don't know what's wrong with my body. Something feels wrong. What I usually do when I feel something off with my body and I don't know w...
Why do so many professors drink diet coke in class? Today I'm going to focus on turning in some late assignments WHILST staying on track of my current assignments. I have a paper I need to finish, and I need to study for a math exam on Thursday. Thursday is named after Thor (Thor's day). The air ...
I should really write here more. Y'all are so supportive, and I really appreciate all the comments you leave. :) This post is going to be a more positive update on my life. So last semester, depending on myself as an adult for the first time in my life, combined with the SA incident with my roommat...
Okay so I'm unfortunately collecting diagnoses at this point. Writing this during start of manic episode so probs not very understandable. Doc says enough for autism diagnosis but thats expensive. Will talk about bipolar next. Learnt that the hallucinations are normal symptom of bipolar. Self harm s...
I fucked up. I found the pro ana side of tumblr and clicked on the tag. I spent hours scrolling through the pictures. Fuck. Well, it's not like I had been going particularly well health wise... I hope the worst this will do to me is shock me back into my planned routine (eat more greens, go on mor...
I'm doing better than before! I got my first letter back from the colleges I applied to... and I was accepted! It's just a safety school but still such a relief. We had enrichments today, which meant we were all allowed to go to school and have our meetings in person, but obviously outside, dista...
I made gingerbread cookies yesterday. They were really good. We usually buy a stale gingerbread house to build and make sugar cookies nobody likes. I used the sugar cookie cutters to make little gingerbread people, trees, and snowflakes. It feels nice to be able to break out of these traditions that...
Do you ever get scared that people don't care as much as you do? I know it's selfish to expect a gift back from someone after you give them a gift, but as someone whose love language is presents and who is extremely self conscious, getting a gift back, no matter how small, feels like a guarantee, a...
I'm trying to make this holiday season more sustainable. I realized something funny yesterday; each year we make sugar cookies because of tradition, but we never like them and always throw them away. I'm not going to make them this year. I'm baking gingerbread cookies :) If y'all have any good recip...
I forgot the name of this website, so I haven't been able to write here recently. I realized that my mother has been directing my anger towards her actions and diverting them onto an easier target, my sister. I hate this. My sister is just annoying, it's my mother who's hurtful. She's definitely t...
I've spent the last few days doing self-care shit, feeling 4 years worth of chronic stress slowly seep out of my body. I seriously went through ALL of my stress activities during the election week - baking, eating, sleeping, insomnia, shopping, drugs, sport, procrastination, etc. Doing anything I co...
I am so fucking scared for the outcome of this election. Why is it that I cannot vote (I'm 17) but all that shit still affects me? What the fuck. And don't give me all that bullshit about not being educated enough to make a good decision - I know for certain that I know more about politics and envir...
