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Going Away

I keep pacing back and forth. I feel like an animal in a cage. The date I have to move out by has moved up again. Now the last possible day that I'll have access to my friend's van is Wednesday and I know that once I move all of my things being left alone here without even a blanket or pillow (let a...

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iyazo (Lvl. 31) - Aug. 23, 2020

Safe Place

Today I went hiking on a trail with a friend. There were a lot more people than we were expecting, I guess because it was such a nice day. For the most part people were still social distancing and wearing masks. We ended up leaving after going up to the observatory spot. It was a nice view, but bein...

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Comments: 0 Words: 393

iyazo (Lvl. 31) - Aug. 22, 2020

Exercising

I'm feeling so overwhelmed. I made more phone calls today and took down more information. I made copies of my medication and contacts lists just in case... One of the people helping me look into resources has unfortunately found nothing either. I feel so lost. There's really nowhere for me to go fro...

1 - Views: 660

Comments: 3 Words: 364

iyazo (Lvl. 31) - Aug. 21, 2020

Off Track

Yesterday was technically moving day for me. I moved most of my stuff into a larger storage unit and now all that I have at the apartment with me are the essentials and a few comfort items. I feel really alone right now. The emptiness and silence of being alone here are getting to me. I guess when t...

1 - Views: 784

Comments: 3 Words: 468

iyazo (Lvl. 31) - Aug. 20, 2020

Worse Than Landlords

Today seemed to be going ok at first. I slept in since it's the weekend- trying to be a little easier and kinder to myself. I watched Lilo and Stitch, one of my favorite movies, and then all the sudden everyone came home. And we had a sit down meeting. Those are never good. I figured....they've both...

1 - Views: 670

Comments: 5 Words: 365

iyazo (Lvl. 31) - Aug. 15, 2020

Eggplant Party

Today was busy and eventful. I was woken up at 9am by my phone ringing. I actually almost got in to see a doctor *today* about a hysterectomy, but it ended up being pushed back to September 18th (the original date) because there wouldn't have been enough time for the exam even though they had a canc...

1 - Views: 728

Comments: 2 Words: 550

iyazo (Lvl. 31) - Aug. 14, 2020

Feeling Overwhelmed

A lot suddenly happened very quickly today. One of those days when something as simple as checking the mail is life-altering. I recieved a letter from a housing authority that I had applied for on a whim...I've been getting a bit desperate to find a place to live. This place happens to be 3 hours aw...

1 - Views: 776

Comments: 2 Words: 344

iyazo (Lvl. 31) - Aug. 13, 2020

8/12/2020

Not much happened today. I guess I can be grateful for that. I went through a lot of my old stuff that I haven't seen in a while since moving here. I found pictures of my mother when she was younger and a lot of clothes that I wore in high school which wouldn't fit on my left leg now lmao I didn't r...

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iyazo (Lvl. 31) - Aug. 12, 2020

The Trail

Today was a good day. I woke up earlier than expected and (as usual lately) couldn't go back to sleep so I got up to work out a little as a warm-up before going out today. My friend and I went and parked by a trail and took a bucket each and decided to clean up the trash that litters the sides of th...

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iyazo (Lvl. 31) - Aug. 10, 2020

In Memory of Stormy the Rabbit

Very early this morning Stormy suddenly started having breathing problems and very quickly passed away before I was able to even wake up my roommate to go to the emergency vet. He was perfectly fine all day, I don't know what could have happened. It's too awful to think about... He was the sweetest ...

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iyazo (Lvl. 31) - Aug. 5, 2020

8/2/2020

Been having problems with dysphoria again, but strangely this time it's my face. I never thought facial hair would give me dysphoria. I know that I don't like it, but those are two different things. I was so in distress about it I called my HRT doctor and she had my routine labs ordered and told me ...

1 - Views: 658

Comments: 4 Words: 119

iyazo (Lvl. 31) - Aug. 2, 2020

The Only Thing I Am Consistently Is Doubtful

I haven't written in a while...I have a bad habit of missing one day of doing something then anxiety will continue to keep me from going back to it. Working out was the same and I'm trying to start that back up again. Art....I really want to do consistently, but I just can't for some reason. I'm st...

2 - Views: 777

Comments: 3 Words: 526

iyazo (Lvl. 31) - July 24, 2020

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